A man is driving down the road and breaks down near a U.S. Marine Corps base. He goes to the front gate, and says to the sentry, "My car broke down. Do you think I could stay the night?"

To his surprise, the Marines accept him enthusiastically. They feed him at the officer's club, they fix his car at the motor pool, and they even allow him to sleep in the VIP quarters.

But, as the man tries to fall asleep that night, he hears a strange sound. All through the night, he hears this sound.

The next morning, he asks the Marines what the sound was, but they say, "We can't tell you. You're not a Marine."

The man is disappointed but thanks them anyway and goes about his merry way.

Some years later, the same man breaks down in front of the same Marine Corps base. Again the Marines accept him enthusiastically, fix his car, and allows him to stay in the VIP quarters. That night, he hears the exact same strange noise that he had heard years earlier.

The next morning, he asks what it is, but the Marines reply, "We can't tell you. You're not a Marine."

The man says, "All right, all right. I'm *dying* to know. If the only way I can find out what that sound was is to become a Marine, how do I become one?"

The Marines reply, "You must go to Paris Island, there to undergo several weeks of torturous behavior. You will be yelled at, put down, cut down, and physically exhausted. From there you will go on to receive infantry training. You will learn how to fight, fight to survive, and fight to win. You will learn how to act the Corps, breath the Corps, eat the Corps, sleep the Corps, be the Corps. When you finish these trials, you will be a Marine."

The man sets about his task. He goes through boot camp, advanced infantry training, and is assigned to an MEU. While part of the MEU he is sent to fight in two small wars, and three "police actions."

Three years later, while on leave, he returns to the Marine Corps base where he last heard that strange, strange sound. Standing there in his dress uniform, he says, "I have joined the Corps, and I have paid my dues. I have fought for the love of God, Country, and the Corps.

The Marines reply, "Congratulations. You are now a Marine. We shall now show you the way to the sound."

The Marines lead the man to a wooden door, where the Base Commander says, "The sound is right behind that door."

The man reaches for the knob, but the door is locked. He says, "Really funny. may I have the key?"

The Base Commander give him the key, and he opens the door. Behind the wooden door is another door made of stone. The man demands the key to the stone door.

The Commander give him the key, and he opens it, only to find a door made of ruby. He demands another key from the Commander, who provides it. Behind that door is *another* door, this one made of sapphire. So it went until the man had gone through doors of emerald, silver, topaz, amethyst...

Finally, the Commander says, "This is the last key to the last door."

The man is relieved to no end. He unlocks the door, turns the knob, and behind that door he is amazed to find the source of that strange sound.

But I can't tell you what it is because you're not a Marine.

I hate you. Making me read all that for nothing. But its a nice joke to tell to my friends! Thanks for sharing!

I had the same feeling when my friend showed me this

I got owned!

...is what I thought...

Lol, that would be a fun joke too.

That is hilarious! I love shaggy dog stories!

Haha, funny way to turn the joke back on the person reading it. I didn't expect that.

Aww, I hate you. Be back in few years, gonna join the Marines.:p

aww i want to be a marine!


how could you make me read all that to find out nothing :(

good joke tho :P

~w&g~

l0l

This reminds me of the time when some friends of mine talked all day about the greatest joke ever, they loved this joke, it was so funny at the end, even though it took a while to tell the joke.
That night they kept me up for an hour and 15 minutes into the night telling me this joke. I wanted to go to sleep, I wanted to leave but they wouldn't let me until it was over. The joke was this repetitive story about a kid who grows up and from the time he could speak he would ask for a pink pingpong ball for every birthday, every Christmas, every easter, every thanksgiving, every holiday - but his father wouldn't buy him that pink pingpong ball because he thought it was girly.
Finally the kid is 18, has a carwreck on his birthday and is on his death bed and all he asks is for a pink pingpong ball. His father gets one, gives it to him and then asked why he wanted one all his life. The kid says "I've always wanted a pink ping pong ball because..." and then he goes flatline.

Yep. 1 hour and 15 minutes spent on wondering why this kid wants a pink pingpong ball and finally when your about to find out why he wants one - the kid dies.
Forunately this joke didn't take nearly as long.

That was hilarious! I'm going to spam that at my friends.

I am telling this to all my friends just to bug them

wow that was a dissapointment

Awwwwww

I have friends who are marines does that count lol. Very nice joke tho.

I feel the same way

lmao.

nice joke.

Good joke, I'll have to share this with my friends.

Pretty good

Am I the only one who didn't find this funny?

sadly for you, my brother is a marine, and i have spent a lot of time with him.



THE SOUND IS THE SOUND OF POULTRYCHAMP MAKING SP*gets shot in the head*

It's not meant to be funny, it's meant to leave the listener dissapointed and guessing what the sound is.
The sound is actually coming from Jagex's secret lab.

Haha, this is like the White Rose Joke Anyone heard it?

I haven't heard it Oscar, mind telling us?

Such a big mistake! Well you asked for it:

One day, a boy was on the bus to school sitting next to his usual friends. In the row in front of him are two of his friends whispering about something called the White Rose. Feeling odd about overhearing their conversation but too curious to stop himself he asks the boys what the White Rose is when they get off the bus. His two friends stop, and start beating the boy saying, "I can't believe you asked about that, we never want to see you again."

When he gets into school, he has a black eye and several scratches along his face. Concerned, his teacher says, "Are you ok? Who did this to you?!" The boy tells him about his two friends attacking him and bursts out "Can you please tell me what the White Rose is?" The teacher grows quiet and says, "Boy, you better come with me to the headmaster, your in very serious trouble."

When he gets to the Headmaster's office, he is greeted by stony silence and the Headmaster furiously asks him why he had done to make the teacher so upset. The boy in his innocence but grow impatience says, "I just asked him about the White Rose, what's the big deal?" The Headmaster goes from red to blue to black to white to red again and finally erupts, "Your expelled boy!"

The boy runs home and sits in the kitchen upset until his mother gets home. His mother asks him what the matter is to which he replies, "Mum I've had such an awful day, I've been beaten up by my best friends, shouted at by the teacher and expelled from school, just for asking what the White Rose is." His mother instantly became thin lipped, close to tears and sent the boy to his room.

When his father comes home, he storms up to his room and demands what the boy has done to make his mother to make her so upset. So he replies back, "I just asked about the White Rose, please can you just to tell me!" to which his father replies "Right get out of my house, I'm disowning you"

The boy walked out in tears and late at night, still crying he's stopped by a police officer who asks him what the matter was. The boy finally breaks down into hysterics and cries, "Officer I've had such a bad day, I've been beaten up by my friends, expelled from school and kicked out of the house by my parents, just for asking what the White Rose is." The police suddenly arrests the boy and takes him to Jail where he spends the night.

In the morning he faces court and explains his story to the judge and still being the naive boy he is finally begs, "Please tell me what the White Rose is" The judge sentences him to 30 years in jail after the jury proclaim him guilty.

30 years later he is released from jail, and receiving his belongings from the judge he says, "I think I have learnt my lesson, I shall never speak of the White Rose again!" The guard responds differently saying, "You obviously haven't!" And the boy receives another 30 years in jail.

After being released for the second time, now an old man, he walks out of prison, enjoying the fresh air when suddenly he sees two old men he recognizes as his old friends. No longer caring about anything he shouts at them "What's the White Rose," runs across the road and gets hit by the bus...

...And the moral of that story is, look before you cross the road

rofl! That one made me laugh! *hooks up printer*

wtf is the white rose?

Bladepaul, get the hell off these forums. You've crossed the line and you are fucking banned.

That will teach him.

the pie was a lie.

The white rose is the secret ingredient in space pie, and the mysterious sound is PC making it.

The mystery is solved!

What a lie

It is one of those things you have to just know.

So did I!

Haha that was good

aww...what...awww

A door made of ruby? The marine probably would have stopped to ask why a door was made out of a precious stone, rather than finding out what the sound was .

Oscar, that was a good one.
I love these jokes, make you think.

"Marine's Joke" Jokes are meant to be funny.

It's supposed to be funny to the person who is making people read this.

So if this joke was told in real life, the person would waste like 5 minutes saying a load of rubbish, and then leaving a stupid clifhanger, and laugh by himself?

Then you and the person you told tell another person and from there you start to form a group.

But if Bob is not going to find it funny, since it's only meant to be funny for the person who tells it (Rob), why is Bob going to carry the joke on if he didn't find it funny. But if Rob tells it to someone else, since he finds it outrageously funny, it still means that he will still be laughing by himself. Fail.

I didn't expect that ending, but, what if I WAS in the marines, what would you tell me then?

I though that was hilarious. XD
*Wanders off to share joke.*